Stranger in Sacramento

by Brute-Force

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01:35
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02:14
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02:36
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about

Act I: Self-Annihilation

All my scattered thoughts put together in a musical format.

Organized Chaos.

credits

released 01 February 2013

tags

tags: hip-hop/rap alternative hip-hop ambient goth lo-fi California

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feeds for this album, this artist
Track Name: Man With No Name
Welcome to the world that i call my mind
Going through life barely functioning right
I was born with a birth defect
A chemical imbalance in my brain
Everytime i jump on the stage
People look at me like i'm insane
Losing sight of reality i'm drowning in my fantasies
Sending in the cavalry won't be enough to damage me
My personality led me to a travesty
Tried to do good but fucked up again
Been losing my whole life will i ever win
Now i'm a demon lurking through the night
Looking for a chick that can keep her shit tight
Drugs and hoes are the only thing important right
Hugs and fake love mean nothing from suburbanites
They wanna bring you down to a life of mediocrity
Fuck watching tv i'm chasing my dreams
Sit on the couch
Judge what other people do
I'd hate to wake up and see it happen to you
Today's the first day of my new life
The only shadow in the spotlight
Today's the first day of my new life
The only shadow in the spotlight
Track Name: 607
Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind
Homicide and violence occurs all the time
Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind
I wanna escape the walls are too high to climb
Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind

The air is so cold and i can't do a thing
But sit here and count down the days until my release
Now i finally know why the caged bird sings
Everyday these zookeepers dehumanize me
Demons in white suits watch over my every move
They stole everything my privacy and dignity
Go into the bathroom blood's drippin down the sink
I see someone pouring chlorine in the fucking drinks
I'm losing control of my brain i hope i don't go insane
Living life in paranoia feeling so deranged

Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind
Homicide and violence occurs all the time
Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind
I wanna escape the walls are too high to climb
Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind

She said it's been a while since i saw you smile
I don't even recognize my own teeth
Can i bring back the innocent person i used to be
Instead of being a savage bloodthirsty murdering beast
All alone in a room confined with misery due to my unstable mind
Resulting from society destroying the satisfaction of being alive
Just hope your destiny doesn't end with a bottle of cyanide
Oh why
Oh why

Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind
Homicide and violence occurs all the time
Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind
I wanna escape the walls are too high to climb
Trapped in 607 and i'm losing my mind
Track Name: Unemployment
Look into my face i know you see the fear
All your past mistakes don't exist here
These drugs give me so much enjoyment
Working everyday no unemployment

Living in a sick world with no health care
Communities gettin spun offa bills from welfare
If they ever quit they'll see the electric chair
Met this girl at party one night
She gave me some special k to feel alright
Next thing you know i'm laying on the ground
My whole body's numb i can't hear a sound
She crushes up this powder into a thin line
She tells me everything'll be fine
(Everything'll be fine)
(Everything'll be fine)
Becoming a scientist experimenting everyway
So many chemicals affecting my brain
It's a full time job not to go insane
So many crystals running through my veins
It's a full time job not to go insane

Look into my face i know you see the fear
All your past mistakes don't exist here
These drugs give me so much enjoyment
Working everyday no unemployment

My teeth keep grinding and my mind keeps racing
Whole body shaking people asking me if i'm alright
Getting so paranoid everyone's my enemy
They probably have a 45 ready to aim at me
Wake up in the morning my eyes are ruby bright
Cause i spent the whole night tryna get this song right
And the media's going crazy over bath salts
When you got half the kids in college snorting adderall
We just a buncha fiends sniffing amphetamines
We can't sleep anymore they stole our dreams

Look into my face i know you see the fear
All your past mistakes don't exist here
These drugs give me so much enjoyment
Working everyday no unemployment

I just wanna feel okay
Fuck what the authorities say
I just wanna feel okay
Fuck what the rest of them say
Track Name: From Bad to Worse
Life'll get bad then it'll get worse
Until you're underground laying under the dirt

The pressure of the world tears you down
Zombie in a hospital gown
Waking up everything's fucked up
It makes you want to give up
Leaning closer to the edge
My mind is cold my sight is red
My mind is red my sight is red
My mind is red my sight is red

Life'll get bad then it'll get worse
Until you're underground laying under the dirt

No one's gonna help you out
They'll leave you alone to suffer
Rather than give a helping hand
They'll push you down further
They'll say you're no good
They'll say you fucking suck
They'll say stop trying and just give up
Believe in yourself cause no one else will
Stand up for yourself cause no one else will

You always finish last it always ends in crash
Slipped off the brakes with your face on the dash

Life'll get bad then it'll get worse
Until you're underground laying under the dirt
Track Name: Turlock, CA
You were the
Best thing that ever happened to me
You never saw me as a travesty
You restored my faith in humanity
But i think
I'm the one who pushed you away
It's probably for the best
I would've just brought you more distress
But you always stay on my mind
Is it love or is it just teenage lust

You were the closest thing i ever felt
To connecting with humanity
The first one to take a chance on me
Both mentally and physically
You must've felt pity
They told me i was just fucked up
Worthless and i needed change
Not you

And when i feel the darkness consuming me
I think about you
I look in the mirror and i hate what i see
And cringe to what i've become
Mr hyde
Mr hyde
I think i could die
But thinkin about her keeps me alive

I know you probably think i'm crazy
I can't be what the world wants me to be
But know that i tried the best i could
All i can do is look from the border
To this girl living in turlock california
Track Name: Vanity
Sick society filled up with vanity
No one left to trust everyone's an enemy
Everyone will leave you dying in the street
Look in the mirror and you hate what you see

Vanity

People sell their soul to be on reality tv
Can't blame them i have my own fantasy
A house by the lake with a sheepskin canopy
A house by the lake with a sheepskin canopy
Rather be a sheep than have creativity
No one gets respect for individuality
Spending all your cream just to boost your self esteem
Look in the mirror and you hate what you see
Spending all your cream just to boost your self esteem
Look in the mirror you still hate what you see

Sick society filled up with vanity
No one left to trust everyone's an enemy
Everyone will leave you dying in the street
Look in the mirror and you hate what you see

We buy shit we don't need to impress people we hate
We buy shit we don't need to impress people we hate

Sick society filled up with vanity
No one left to trust everyone's an enemy
Everyone will leave you dying in the street
Look in the mirror and you hate what you see

Fake world fake love
Fake lives fake drugs
Fake people stay smug
Fake world no love
Killed my old self and swept him under a rug
Killed my old self and swept him under a rug

Vanity

Fake smiles fake love
Fake people stay smug
Track Name: Mad Scientist
I'm a mad scientist
In an all black lab coat
There's a monster in my head
And screws in my throat

He comes alive during the night
He won't sleep until i'm dead
Everyday when i wake up
Stains on my clothes from bloodshed
From bloodshed

I'm a mad scientist
In an all black lab coat
There's a monster in my head
And screws in my throat

Turn on the news and i see his face
And his face turns grey
As the soldiers cock their guns
And the children run away
He's lost all humanity
Two thousand killings just this week

I'm a mad scientist
In an all black lab coat
There's a monster in my head
And screws in my throat

Up late in the lab looking for a cure
But there's no magic potion
There's no vaccine
To cure myself of my own insanity

I'm a mad scientist
In an all black lab coat
There's a monster in my head
And screws in my throat
Track Name: Dolo
Always alone always alone
Always alone
And you'll always be alone

They call me insane
They say i'm deranged
Didn't say much in class
Always the outcast
Grew up thinkin that my mind wasn't right
Because i never acted like a socialite
I never fit in the mold of society
They'd understand if they switched shoes and just could be me
Broken and cold with nowhere to go
I guess i'll always be alone

Always alone always alone
Always alone
And you'll always be alone

I'm the outcast of the outcasts
The one no one cared to know
And every time i walk past
They look at me like i have no soul
I just wasn't meant for this world
Track Name: Hell on Earth
I tell myself i'm moving forward when i'm only moving back
Every single step i take just makes everything worse
She says i look cute when i act nervous
She has no idea that's my biggest curse
And i hate being alone in bed
All these evil thoughts consume my head
Wide awake at 4 o clock in the morning
Taking stimulants to calm down my yawning
My throat keeps burning from the adderall drip
I'm not an addict i just don't wanna quit
I'm a mad scientist this is my experiment
I'm a mad scientist this is my experiment

Nothing ever changes and nothing ever works
Going through hell everyday i call it hell on earth

Fuck this world fuck this planet
I hate myself and i can't stand it
I'm sick of walking in circles
I'm tired of having no direction
I'm sick and tired man i'm sick and tired
I'm sick and tired of having no control
I'm sick and tired of having zero hope
Everything good that happens gets taken away
I keep chasing the high hoping this time it stays
I don't know who i am i don't know where i'm going
Just pacing through life hoping just hoping
I don't know who i am i don't know where i'm going
Going through the motions hoping just hoping

Nothing ever changes and nothing ever works
Going through hell everyday i call it hell on earth

I lost my soul a long time ago
Now all that's left is a shadow

My face is always straight my eyes are always dry
Never show emotion only females cry
Staring at me staring at me all of em keep staring at me
Laughing at me laughing at me why do you keep laughing at me
Looking at me looking at me why the fuck are you looking at me
I'm trapped in a box playing tic tac toe and these o's wanna ex me out
I feel like i'm living in hell a prisoner in a one man cell
What could be worse than living this life i'd rather be a sacrifice

Am i dr jeckyll or am i mr hyde
All i know is that there's a monster trapped inside
My mind telling me these thoughts of misery
I take ten pills to get them away from me
But late at night I can hear the voices getting louder
Hands go into convulsions blood turns colder
I got two friends sitting on my shoulder
The one on the left's getting taller and bolder
The right one with the halo just rolled over
Track Name: Styx (Fallen Angel)
What did i do to deserve this
Why do i even exist
It feels like i'm living in hell on earth
An angel in the mist

What did i do to deserve this
I feel like i'm living in hell on earth
I feel like i'm living in hell on earth

What did i do to deserve this
Why do i even exist
It feels like i'm living in hell on earth
An angel in the styx
Track Name: L O S T
Lost in a race
Finished last place
I lost my face
I lost my face

Lost in a race
Finished last place
I lost my faith
I lost my faith

Lost in a race
Finished last place
I lost my name
I lost my name

Lost in a race
Finished last place
I lost my way
I lost my way
Track Name: The Stranger
Man i'm so fuckin depressed
I can't even get out of bed
Staring at this bitches chest
Semen dripping down my leg
Having so much jaded sex
It all feels so meaningless
But it's the closest feeling i'll ever get to happiness

They don't know
They'll never know

My life is filled with fear and doubt
I have no one to help me out
They say i have a broken mouth
Im solo dolo down and out
Sittin on an empty bus
Staring at a blank notepad
I see kids playing outside
Something that i never had

They don't know
They'll never know

Im anxious and im terrified
I hate this world i wanna die
Walking through life in a haze
I barely feel like i'm alive
Walking through life like a mime
Always getting left behind
If anybodys listening
Can you relate to whats in my mind

They don't know
They'll never know

I'm tired of whinin but i gotta get this off my chest
Everyday i wake up feeling manic or depressed
I swear to god i'm fucking stressed
Terrified what'll happen next
I'm sitting all alone in bed
Fantasizing about my death
Maybe if i take this blade and slide it down across my neck
It'll end all this distress
Then i can finally rest
Maybe if i take this blade and slide it down across my neck
It'll end all this distress
Then i can finally rest

They don't know
They'll never know

Man I'm so fuckin depressed
I can't even get out of bed
There's a scar across my neck
And blood dripping down to my legs
Blood dripping down to my legs